Refresh

Refresh

Le Buddy – “Do you think that you’ve been studying all wrong all your life?”

Le Me – “I’m really starting to think of it.”

“What is it that you think you need to change? Where should you start?”

“I think I need to begin with learning to ask the right questions at the right time. Never hesitate. I think curiosity is a must to build fresh perspectives. We’ve gotten very comfortable in our skins. Everything is so set in its routine, especially our knowledge and where it comes from, I think we need to start thinking anew to know our roots, “our” meaning the roots of humans.”

“Why do you want to go so far back?”

“Because I think that only then will we truly start to understand our value, the true value of all that we get from Mother Earth and the universe. We have to get to the beginning when it all started, to learn that all of us are equally sacred and all the negativity that separates us today is our own creation and no one else’s. It’s definitely not what life would have wanted us to be. We need to understand the oneness of our life, understand the union of our body and soul, to truly understand our function. I think we’ve lost our way and only now are we at the beginning when we can change everything around us. Build something new and great, do it for yourself and don’t be afraid to give and share, for it’ll all return to you. At every living moment we must remember and acknowledge that this universe runs on trade and balance will automatically happen. We need to pursue the multiplication of happiness.”

“Well, these are pretty big words.”

“Yes! But the actions required are small. Save water, plant trees, harness renewable energy which truly is abundantly available to us, stop creating plastic, use all our technology only to preserve what we have left. Meditate, cherish the silence of nature and the sound of your soul, try and connect with your higher self, believe in miracles and magic for it is all around us. Be empathic and watch how your children grow into beings and teach them to be good to mankind. I can go on and on but all of this is pretty simple. Let the nature know that you are working for it and not fighting against it and see the difference happening. Spread awareness but don’t infuse fear. Create!”

“All of this will surely refresh our perspective.”

The Edge

It’s been a very productive weekend or let me just correct myself and say that this is the most productive Sunday of my life. Simply based on the actual knowledge I gained today, I’ve probably laid down the foundation for a lot to enter me, alleviating all fear.

Talking of fear, I realize why I so desperately wanted to shift my knowledge of the world. I thought what if I am the only one who thinks that aliens arriving to Earth is a very possible phenomenon. I know a lot of you will still disagree with me but I’m not writing to challenge any philosophy or belief system. I’m simply more than happy to now know that there are people in this world who think the way I do. People who don’t disagree with the current system but they want to mend it to include more freedom. To let creators create, let the teachers learn for themselves by experimenting and to make the children think beyond what is normally around us.

What we, as in our “Cultivated and Awakened” society, have built around us is a wall so huge, so powerful that our kids fail to see what’s beyond it. We’re teaching them a whole lot more, making their curriculum tougher with more homework, more physical work, but we constantly fail to address their sensitivity. We fail to let them know that we’re there for them. That we’re creating a better world for them. They give in to the system around them so easily, it’s like slicing a knife through butter.

Only to feed your mind, here’s a bit of what I think –

Anyway, I probably now understand why exactly did I once see what I saw during my meditation. I felt the breeze, the sound of water splashing against stones, and when I opened my eyes, I saw a huge wall of single stone, wet from the bottom all the way to the top. It had tiny weed like grass with its flowers protruding through its cracks which almost made the wall look alive. It added so much drama. But then I realized that I’m in a boat, on the edge of the beach, and slowly floating away from the reality that the world has created for me. As I moved away, I found that the wall actually was a plateau, with a huge and dense forest on top of it and it ran deep into the land of the world that I was so happy to be leaving. As I kept moving away, I felt at peace and I turned around and the sun was shining at the horizon, invigorating every sense inside me, filling me with hope that one day I’ll be one with it!

Footsteps

Le God – “It was a great movie we watched today – The Fountain!”

Le Me – “Yup. I never thought something so close to what I am turning into, would land so straight in my lap.”

“How’d you get your hands on the name of the movie?”

“Well, there’s a great channel called Spirit Science on YouTube. It was one of their recommendations”.

“What did you learn from the movie?”

“That trees are truly the greatest source of life. That nothing can survive without them and that I must strive to be more like a tree.”

“Well, I agree but how do you plan to be like a tree?”

“You see,  a tree only acts for its own survival. It stands tall facing the harsh sun, the storms, the rains, sometimes it survives the flood and sometimes it doesn’t. It stands tall till it can serve by consuming what is available from the nature. It doesn’t depend on anyone else. The byproduct of its function is oxygen on which humans survive. I can never be thankful enough to all trees for they facilitate human survival and therefore, eventually mine. When a tree looks down upon me, I am filled with hope, I hear a promise, a promise to be friends till death does us apart. Then there are fruits, flowers, glue, bark, roots and shade. Everything about a tree is selfless and yet it only truly works for itself. Every tree is a living example of what every human should be. Live and let live and never let the fruit of your actions be the goal of your existence. Did you notice how protagonist of the movie tries to get a tree to survive? Because that’s the source, that’s where all life births from. That’s where it shows how all life is being destroyed by a random action triggered by a human. And yet the movie keeps the sanctity of nature alive by letting the circle of life complete by itself, whether be it by disease culminating into death. And even in death, a tree decomposes to give all that it can to Mother Earth. You can’t cheat death but you can definitely ascertain that you live longer and more in harmony with nature by respecting it, treating it as equal, and valuing all that it gives us. We’re doing no justice to our own species by not letting the nature take its normal course of action. And that in the end, we’ll have to run towards it for our own survival when there’ll not be much of it left to support us.”

“Do you think you are doing enough to reverse this dangerous trend of destruction?”

“No, I don’t. All I’m helping with and doing on my part is trying to stem the damage but it clearly isn’t enough.”

“Hmmm… Sounds kinda sad.”

“I know. It’ll take a tremendously collective effort to educate people and reverse the damaging trends and habits that our past generations have imbibed in our heads. It’ll take a resolve so great, it has to be like the meditation of a single human being for a 1000 years summed into a single day. We’ve followed, for eons, the misguided footsteps that our forefathers left for us. It’s time now to change the path and follow the right direction. To let the nature see that we take it seriously and that we value its contribution in our lives. People are working towards it and it’ll take all their perseverance, hardwork, resolve and necessary contribution from the rest of us to save our planet, save our trees.”

Superstitions and Awareness

It’s been a while since I started asking life to guide me rather than let me guide the life. For once, I want to get rid of the power and responsibility that has for so long bogged me down. I just need indications, some as subtle as a breeze, some as powerful as an emotion that tears apart any thought that may misguide me. I get them, in numbers, in colors, in sounds, in aromas, and in the random images in my head for I need to know my patterns.

About these sensations, it’s tough to start feeling them. They don’t come so easy. But once you do start to feel them, they are absolutely precious and you don’t want to let them go. You treasure them, remember them and start associating them to your random actions that may have triggered them. And these are what I call superstitions.

“Oh, now I understand why I’m having such a bad day at work… I forgot my handkerchief”.

Alright this one happened to me, about 3 years ago and I remember it as clear as day that it was – I was leaving for my office when I stepped on a piece of cow-dung while getting on my bike. Now, as a normal plan of action created in haste would be, I tried cleaning my shoe against a stone and started on my journey not realizing the kind of peril I am indulging in. A kilometer from my house and I met with an accident because someone in a real Indian haste, had popped into the wrong lane and banged into me. Now it was easy for me to start yelling at the stupidity of that moment but the fact that nothing had happened to me prevented me from taking any further action.

I now look back to that day and see how I may have averted that action myself. I now realize that while all of it seems to be the fault of the person coming in the wrong lane, my foot had slipped too, off from the brake pedal because of the dung that had stuck to my shoe which took me a bit farther even when I did apply the pressure on the pedal in time. Also, what haste did to me was, took me away from the necessary action of washing my shoe sole before leaving for work. What was I thinking going to work with dung sticking to my shoe?

Not that I have to forgive myself for the accident or the other person for the accident but that’s how life is – unpredictable. Both he and I had laid the foundation for an accident way before we actually met with one. They are just actions – unknown and unpredictable. We never went out to hurt each other intentionally and thankfully we didn’t but these are situations that lay the perfect ground for a superstition –

“Never in my life must I leave my house if I’ve stepped onto cow dung, much like never step a foot across the line in which a black cat has crossed the road.”

In fact, coming to think of it, I have actually fallen off my bicycle after a black cat crossed the road, but that was way back when I was a child and didn’t know what to make of it. Ahhh… a child’s mind, its innocence and what would I give to have it now. However, cometh a superstition, and followeth the remedy – and only heaven knows what form of depravity will that be made of. Brooms, potatoes, bananas, combined with wizardry and sorcery, with incense sticks burning – man, just give me all of that and I’ll surely put them to their respective uses than killing the demons of my action.

Now, the awareness of the situation could have made me think of the damage that I may cause to people in case I couldn’t press the brake pedal with the dung-laden foot. But who knew?! And only in the interest of other humans, I should have washed my shoe. That is what we all must do – take a minute and think of the damage that our actions may cause to other humans. We must always be thoughtful of the physical damage that we may cause to others.

And awareness will always kill superstitions. Never let your inner guidance rise to the level of superstitions. If the guidance comes and you realize it, it will come again, in the same form or the other. Just, be patient. Nature made you and it’ll surely guide you.

 

Resistance

Pronunciation –

re·sist·ance rəˈzistəns

Definition –

the refusal to accept or comply with something; the attempt to prevent something by action or argument.

  • armed or violent opposition.
  • a secret organization resisting authority, especially in an occupied country.
  • the underground movement formed in France during World War II to fight the German occupying forces and the Vichy government.
  • the impeding, slowing, or stopping effect exerted by one material thing on another.

the ability not to be affected by something, especially adversely.

  • lack of sensitivity to a drug, insecticide, etc., especially as a result of continued exposure or genetic change.

the degree to which a substance or device opposes the passage of an electric current, causing energy dissipation. Ohm’s law resistance (measured in ohms) is equal to the voltage divided by the current.

  • a resistor or other circuit component that opposes the passage of an electric current.

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I’m realizing and recognizing the patterns that resistance creates within me. This force is the strongest wall that exists inside me and it’s as magical, mystical as it is natural, exoteric. It’s built of an accumulated wealth of my perceptions of pain and pleasure and others’ definitions of what births happiness and sorrow.

Why did I create this wall? From right when I was born, I was fed how to react to pain and pleasure differently. Pain and pleasure are polar opposites. While pain by definition is a symptom of (feelings of) hurt and hence, unwanted; pleasure by definition is something or someone that provides a source of happiness, and hence, it’s an experience sought by everyone.

Since my younger days, I’ve miscalculated pain and pleasure and I think I feel differently about their degrees of effect on me. While due to all the safe modern equipment, I am kept safe from physical hurt and hence, lesser physical pain, I do experience significant emotional pain from time to time. For some reason, rather unknown to me, I’ve realized that it is me who invites and applies that pain to myself. There is a rather self-destructing sound to it and I’m not very proud of it. And therefore, I created a wall inside me, that filters what goes in and what goes out.

All that permeates my skin encounters this barrier repeatedly. While some of the external forces that touch this wall dissipate effortlessly into rainbows, others are miraculously absorbed into it, only making it stronger. It’s a wall so high, it can only be the manifestation of a heart battered and bruised from brutalities and yet it is as strong and seamless like new. There seem no fissures, no holes that adorn it or maybe I’ve just not looked close enough.

It’s funny to think that I let my resistance keep me away from the enriching experiences of the world only because they served others differently.

Yet it’s amazing that this resistance keeps me. It maintains me. It keeps off the bad and allows the good, sparsely though. My egos – the alter and physical one alike feed on resistance. It’s the keeper of the most powerful frictional energy inside my mind. It’s an energy barrier that carries with it the fear of the known and unknown alike. Resistance is the culmination of a two faced monster called choice.

I think the only choice that we don’t have is of death. Else we choose at every living moment. Choice spoils us. Choices are mostly tough yet, can be easy. Choices, depending on their effect, can be classified into: good, neutral, and bad. The only downside of not choosing well is that it leaves with the longing for the other, better alternative. Otherwise, the purpose of a choice – good, neutral, or bad – is to lead you to another choice. A choice is never singular, in that I mean, no choice can be made to have no effect. The only thing consistent about choice is that every choice has an effect even if it was made to choose between bad and neutral. A choice always leaves you with a path that you’ve chosen – and thus friction. The friction between the types of choices we have to make every day and live with them, live in them. The memory of every choice rots us from the inside by pinning us to the past. A past that has choices as many as we’ll make in the future. But then we’re stuck to the future, one that we haven’t yet seen, a future that we can only plan on seeing, a future that is only as plausible as the result of the flip of a coin.

Resistance is a two way street. While the way in which the writer will eventually portray it, is negative, yet it is equally positive. In fact, when a child is born, society does  condition its children to first build a wall around them. Don’t do this, don’t do that! Parents teach their children to resist all that has been bad for them or for the equivalent others. While some of the resistance, and hence, fears, they feed a child with, are what you eventually need to survive, a mind can easily be disillusioned by the choices that he has at hand. While properly educated choices lead to better decisions, the choices made with half-baked knowledge often lead to failures. Failures increase the resistance to ever face such choices again and this is when resistance births fear. Human brain, as noisome as it is, doesn’t always know when to stop imparting the half-baked knowledge that resides inside it. Society breeds fear in the child’s mind about things that are supposed to hurt him. But they really aren’t aware if those things will really ever hurt him, and if they do, how much will they hurt him? Just like everyone has different longing for pleasure, they have different pain tolerances. Think closely and we’ll realize that when we don’t think before starting to instill fear in the minds of our children or ourselves, we are feeding perceptions and experiences that we’ve never actually had. That’s like disliking the food that we’ve never tasted or hating the man for a crime that he has never committed. And fear has as they say –

“Clearly, all fear has an element of resistance and a leaning away from the moment. Its dynamic is not unlike that of strong desire except that fear leans backward into the last safe moment while desire leans forward toward the next possibility of satisfaction. Each lacks presence. (29)”
― Stephen LevineA Year to Live: How to Live This Year as If It Were Your Last

Resistance is the ceiling that is tough to break through. I am right there. I feel the extreme cold, wet, impeding, tough vibes from the people around me. I feel this force every time I am hit by a thought that is supposed to inspire and enthrall me and yet I am confused only because I don’t trust my instincts any more. How can I leave them behind; the people that have led me to become the miserable person I am now, the situations that have tested my morals, my patience, my perseverance, my beliefs and the quintessential – my trust. I am nothing without trust. My world revolves around it. I don’t trust myself to make better choices for myself. I don’t trust others easily. While some may argue that I can start with a clean slate, it isn’t easy for me, for there is Resistance!

My Optimist

My Optimist

Believes in unity

Believes in honesty

Believes in integrity

Thrives on trust

Believes in equality

Believes in equity

Believes in keeping everything simple.

Seeks happiness from the smile of the most unfortunate

Seeks to educate

Believes in taking its own sweet time

Believes that there is always enough time.

Believes the Sun will always shine bright for you

The grass will always stay green

The trees want to hug you

The air whispers prayers in your ears

The fire in your heart is as fiery as the Sun

Faith is solid as a rock

The sky will always be blue

The stars and the moon will light the night.

Knows that no pain beats a mothers labour pain

Knows that no happiness beats the one that a dog experiences when the master arrives home

Knows that fear seeds all illness

Knows that no opponent hits harder than the truth

Knows that lies break relationships

The greatest relationship you must have is with yourself.